Will you blow on my dice?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
