the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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