they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
