At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
