I puked a lego.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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