why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
