roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Randomize
