Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
