I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I understand Curling. That high.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
