Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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