She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Randomize
