the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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