You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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