I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
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