Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
