I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
