i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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