Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
ttyl tear gas
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
