What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
