Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
