Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
