Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
