I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
