why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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