He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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