Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
