Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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