there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
