i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
