Having a random hookup so left but love u
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I want to fling myself into the sun
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
