dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
it was like his penis was on wheels.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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