Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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