i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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