you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
