Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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