capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
