You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
