You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
