i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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