Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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