the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
