It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Randomize
