Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
