omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
