Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
