I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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