he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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