I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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