your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
