just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
