somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
